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Will I never learn?

Why do I repeatedly sit on the couch with my legs stretched across to the coffee table, crossed with one ankle over the other? Gravity is certainly no friend to knees hovering over the space between couch and table. After a while I will inevitably start to feel an ache in the bottom knee. I reverse the cross of my legs, but within a few minutes the new bottom knee starts to ache. I'm probably in the middle of working or playing on the laptop, so I ignore it. I'll get up in a minute.

The thing about me on my laptop is I can ignore most other things when I'm on it. I get pulled-in, focused and that's that. I can turn off all awareness beyond the computer. I think I could actually have surgery without anesthesia if I just got involved in something on my laptop before they made the first incision.

A half hour goes by and I become acutely aware that the dull ache in my knee has grown to agonizing levels of pain. I finally decide to pull my legs off the table, which hurts even more. The lower knee really doesn't want to bend now. I bend it anyway... OUCH!... Then I get up and limp around like an idiot for a few minutes until the pain subsides and I can walk normal.

When I sit back down on the couch, the cycle repeats itself.

I'm doing it right now. Augh. It's really going to hurt when I get up.


( 2 comments — Add a comment )
Jan. 17th, 2009 01:53 pm (UTC)
I think I could actually have surgery without anesthesia if I just got involved in something on my laptop before they made the first incision.

You get up one day, realizing you're very sore and there are surgical tools near the coffee table.

"Honey, what're these for?"

The hubby comes in, "While you were trying to analyze one of Sarah Connor's dreams I grafted a Wolverine like endoskeleton into your body and added the claws, too."


"Anyways, we're out of ketchup and mustard. I'm making a run to the store. Want anything?"

"A whetstone." *snikt*
Jan. 17th, 2009 11:47 pm (UTC)
"One morning Gregor Samsa awoke to find that he had a metal endoskeleton and retractable claws..."
( 2 comments — Add a comment )


roxy burglar
Roxy Bisquaint

Roxy Bisquaint...

Is self-indulgent. Over thinks everything. Tweets too much. Looks really good in these jeans. Wants to eat butterscotch. Makes herself laugh. Obsesses about aging. Does some crunches. Lives with two ghosts. Procrastinates daily. Measures once, cuts twice. Hates Foo Fighters. Drinks lots of coffee (keep it coming). Puts spiders outside. Brings balance to the force. Draws a perfect curve. Enjoys dark chocolate. Bangs on the drums. Always gets in the slow line. Orders from a menu. Hopes to be reincarnated. Speaks fluent Sarah Connor. Cooks tasty crack theory. Loves a good storm. Dances like a dork. Picks some locks. Tips well. Refuses to share the popcorn. Dreams about the future. Ignores the clock. Sings off key. Has a superpower. Shoots the paper bad guys. Needs some eyeliner. Goes to bed at dawn. Can't resist good smut. Quotes movie lines. Eats whipped yogurt. Lets the story tell itself. Maintains a rich fantasy life. Knows all the mysteries of the gods and of the universe.

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